Another beach trip finished, another year that I nor any of my kin were eaten by a shark.  Let’s see…that should come to Me: 33, Sharks: 0.  And if you think this is not a genuine concern of mine, you haven’t been paying attention.

My healthy (?) fear of all stingy, bitey, grab-y things that live and lurk in the ocean is something I hope to pass on to my little girl.  After all, it’s the constant vigilance this fear inspires that keeps my family alive year after year.  Don’t believe me?  Fine.  Whatever.  I’m sure you’re only here to mock me because someone cared enough to ward off jellyfish, sea snakes and Great White sharks through sheer force of will for you.

Shall we just agree to disagree and look at some pictures? 

The warm summer sun bestowing its blessings on my little Samurai.  You’ll be happy to know that I troweled sunblock on this child and myself every day, thus leaving her a beautiful brown and me a less-angry-than-usual pink.

Evie scrutinizes the ocean.  The verdict was “not [s]cary”. 

Meet Evie and her bucket.  They’re pretty serious about each other.  Sometimes they spend entire days together, Evie filling up the bucket with water and dumping it out.  Filling it up, dumping it out.  Filling it up, dumping it out.  Down to the ocean, back up to the tent.  Down to the ocean, back up to the tent.  She napped for three solid hours every afternoon, y’all.

Diet Coke is delicious!  Evie wants you to know there’s nothing like stealing your mom’s and relaxing in the shade after a full morning of filling up the bucket.

I thought I’d share with you the album cover for the latest record by Evie and the Beach Bums.  There was some rumor that Evie was going to leave the group to pursue a solo career, but she’s been backed by the Beach Bums for two years.  Luckily for their fans, she’s with the group to stay.

“Well, Bunny, if you insist on giving me ice cream for breakfast, I guess there’s nothing I can do but just snuggle my adorable self up to you some more!”

That’s right, Pop.  Hold her far, far out of the water because you never know when you’re gonna – wait…was that a fin?  I’m pretty sure I saw a really big fin behind that second wave.  What?  Well, hell, who do you think I learned it from?

One day they’ll both be riding the biggest waves they can find, careening at top speed towards shore with big grins on their faces.  And I…will have another Valium, thank you very much.

“Uncle J, if I brought my kitties to the beach, do you think they would swim like your doggies do?  I love you, Uncle J.  I don’t think I’ve told you that today.”

“Thank you for buying these shades for me, Baba.  Now all these jokers must bow down to our coolness.  And would that sippy be filled with Diet Coke, Auntie?”


Hmmm…and what might you be up to, little missy?

So there you go – Beach Trip 2010.  We swam, we played, we ate too much pie.  We talked, we laughed, we tried to walk too far down the beach and had to be picked up in a car.  We got sand in places we didn’t know we had.  We spent time with the people who know us the best and love us anyway.  We’ll be back next year.


During Evie’s daily marathon naps, the adults would have “adult time”, which meant three hours of cuttin’ up, goofin’ off and generally acting like children.  One afternoon my sister, Auntie, and I teamed up against my other sister, Aunt Boo, and her husband, Uncle J, in a  friendly little game of Spades.  You should know that one of the reasons Uncle J and Boo were made for each other is that from golf to Cornhole, there’s nothing these two like better than to play.  And the only thing better than playing is winning, which they most often do.   You should also know that Auntie and I are really big goobers, who won the first game of Spades by sheer luck but then proceeded to have our butts soundly whipped by J and Boo and spent the rest of the games making faces at each other, telling stupid jokes, drinking beer and taking pictures of everybody.  Below are my favorites:

J and Boo’s long faces during Auntie’s and my one-game reign of terror.


These are the faces of winners, y’all.

And these are the faces of the world’s biggest losers.